All I ever wanted was just one person

You know I never wanted to become this pathetic desperate guy I've come to be now.

Many times I wish I could just un-live the past two months of my life, return back to a time when I didn't know I could be so hopelessly addicted to a person that my sanity would one day be under his mercy.

I despise this weak person that I've become, clinging so single-sided and fool-hardedly to a person who had once given me hope and showed me the wonders of life but only to take them all back later and left me reminiscing the happiness that could have been and feeling the hollowness of unfulfilled promises.

Is this a curse put on me from my last relationship? I left my last ex after a two month relationship, now it's someone else's turn to leave me after two months. Perhaps karma is true afterall, or perhaps we are all just selfish souls searching of our so-called love and never cared about what trails of destructions we leave in our wake along the way.

Perhaps he was just my Christmas wish came true. when Christmas had come and gone, so had he. Will I ever be able to celebrate Christmas without being reminded of him again?

I am not sure I can ever believe in love again. I long for the time when I will be able to put this all behind, get back up on my own feet and feel hopeful about love and the future again. But at the moment, all I can do is just be embittered. Embittered of an unrequited love sought so hardly over what seemed like an eternity now.