The Calm

It's getting more difficult for me to continue in the happy story.

Doubts surfaced, and questions unanswered.. it's the familiar pattern of another story without an end.

It has been barely a month since we first met, perhaps he still isn't sure, perhaps he's already having second thoughts, or perhaps I'm just being too insecured and paranoid, but the thing is, I'm beginning to think for the worse from the way things turning from hot to cold lately.

I won't be surprised even if is really so, cos there are never guarantees, he can love you like you are the only thing that mattered, only to abandon you next when the flame has died down.

It's just sad really, that when others are ready to love you forever, you said you are not; and when you think you are ready to love forever, they are having second thoughts.

We have not said anything about love actually, just because of that two times of the word 'boyfriend' he mentioned so casually in his sentences, that I gave myself false hope into thinking this could actually be it, the be-all-end-all of my quest for the one whom I'll be walking happily together with for the rest of my life.

"Silly boy", one of my female colleague used to tease me. I guess I am.

Happy New Year and wish you all many happy returns.