Purpose

In continuation of my previous entry..

It's a strange feeling sometimes, when I think of the purpose I am here in this world. Is it arrogant to think that I, a mere individual in this infinitely (well almost) huge cosmos, has a purpose in the 'grand scheme of things'?

Or maybe I am somewhat misguided for keep thinking that I have a purpose here? Could it be that there is actually no true purpose in this existence of mine? That I in fact has a defective logic which has lead me to believe that I am actually 'special'?

It's possible that all these thinking of purpose and whatnots may actually be ways I'm using to escape from the reality. I needed to think that there is more to my existence here than just my foolish efforts of looking for Mr. Perfect.

Well, seems like the root problem boils down again to finding a partner isnt' it? How perdictable of me eh? LOL.

Sometimes I realize it's a waste of time to think about things that are beyond my understanding, like the cosmos and stuff (duh! :-P), but you know, when you are like me who has nothing else to look forward to other than chatting with a middle-aged guy living halfway across the globe and who probably isn't looking for what I'm looking for, the impossibility of understanding the cosmos actually feels like the easier thing to do :-)