Thanks to the playing of my favourite Kylie Minogue song 'I believe in you', I now have the strength and mood to write yet another diary entry about this recent King of Lovelorn that is me.
We chatted on the net today. After he ended the chat with, "Gtg, take care", I found myself not able to get back into the mood to continue my work, as all kinds of emotions seem to rush into my little head, pumping my senses with images and thoughts of him.
I sat there stoned, until I realized that the sweet memories from the day we met has slowly became my venom, poisoning my mind and soul with every recall.
On my way home from work, my thoughts were all about figuring out what I should do to break out of this dead end.
Then suddenly, as if some mental defensive mechanism has finally decided to kick off to give me a hand, the depression lifted. I suddenly became very rational, and I wondered, "Are these infatuations nothing but my own selfish desires to make a person mine?"
Is love about owning someone? Is love about sulking over someone whom I can't get love from? Is love about getting the perfect person to be my life partner?
I refuse to believe that love is something so superficial, and if I am guilty of any of these thoughts, then parhaps what I feel now is not love, but selfishness.
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